A New Season

I'm sitting on the sofa holding my newborn daughter thinking about life seasons.  I peruse my way through the various life stages that I have lived and observed feeling awed that we experience so much. 

Yesterday the call came that my grandmother doesn't have much time left. I have expected that call for ten years. After all she is 97. It still hurt to think about her dying. It hurts to think of my mom losing her momma. My heart doesn't seem to care that grandmother hadn't been able to be "mom" for years.  Even though I've been prepared for grandmother's home going for years I am still sad that her passing is now imminent. My brain tries to paint the picture of my memories with her absent and fails. New memories will need to be made.

Part of this season I'm in is sleepless nights and diapers. My mother is in a season of care giving and headed into a season of grief.  Grandmother has entered a season of letting go. They all overlap. My heart hurts, celebrates, laughs, cries, is thankful and angry all at once. This is life. Seasons that overlap and contradict each other. Seasons to be lived. Seasons that require me to reach out to the Father for grace, comfort, guidance, stamina and wisdom.

I watch my baby's face and picture my grandmother in my mind. Both are cherished people. I am blessed, I get to know them both. I will share grandmother with baby as she grows through my memories. I will walk this season glad for my mother's wisdom. I will choose to remember that there is Grace for all these seasons. He will carry us when we stumble and dance with us in times of joy.

Lord, thank you for walking with me in every season. Help me to remember to turn to you when nights feel long, hearts feel heavy' and especially when joy over flows.

This post was written in September 23rd 2013. My baby was 18 days old. My Grandmother passed on to glory on September 25th.

A season of busy

Well My friends.... My last post was May11th. Today  is June 8th.

Life is good. God is so good. This season has been busy, busy and productive. I am thankful. I was feeling seriously guilty about not posting. Then Father God reminded me that worry is not of Him. He is directing this season. I need to function each day in obedience to His leading not my own. I am making my time with the Father first priority. Writing must come last in this season. Please do not give up on me. I have posts they will be coming just not as frequently as in the past.
Following His leading, I have researched and built our homeschool curriculum for the 2011-2012 school year. My business - Aspire Productions LLC is getting lots of work. The many "Aspire events" are in various stages of planning and execution. We have almost completed room renovation for T's room. She will be moving is soon. Of course , Pixie is moving with her while we repaint her room. We are preparing for the the Aldersgate 2011 conference in Dayton OH.  This summer is loaded and we are ready to jump on the roller coaster. Life is so exciting! I am blessed.

Thank you each and all for reading!

More to come soon in the journey of chasing my God!

Caite

#*?%&*%*# Catalogs

I love Christmas.

I love the family time. I love the traditions. Every year, I am amazed by the bigness of what God chose to do at Christmas.

It is eleven weeks until Christmas. Eleven. Not three. Not seven. Eleven weeks away. We have not yet celebrated the Harvest Moon, Halloween or even Columbus day! We are still settling in to the whole school routine. So can someone please tell me why I must endure the flood of catalogs? Why I must look at skinny snow bunnies and pages and pages of cute gadgetry that, if I order it, will only guarantee the arrival of MORE catalogs?

There is something in my genetic code that will not allow me to pitch a catalog before I have looked through it. So before I have enjoyed fall a whole week, it is encroached upon by Christmas. I love Christmas. But why now? Life is rushed enough. I do not want to spend a glorious fall sifting through holiday catalogs.

It is not my intent that this blog become a place that continually grumps about all that is wrong in our society. That said, the commercialism of Christmas will have to wait this year. In fact, I may not engage in it at all. I think I might just give everyone homemade scarves or homemade jelly and forget the search for the elusive perfect gift. Christmas, for me, is rejoicing that God decided to save me. It is spending time with people I love and lavishing them with my caring. Of course this is a difficult statement to execute. I know there will be some shopping. I think I am just irritated that it has started so soon.

I love fall. So I will revel in the crisp mornings and the lovely afternoons. I will cherish the colors as they drift from green to burgundy, orange, yellow and brown. I will take life slowly and enjoy the season. I will be blessed in the fall. I will not be rushed by the world.

I am adjusting my attitude. Christmas catalogs that I might purchase from will go into the box labeled "later." The rest will find residence in the circular file. I am determined to not keep every catalog. I am determined not to be overwhelmed by the commercial holiday. It is my heart's desire to be overwhelmed by the love of the season and by loving those around me.

Lord, Help me guard my mind and heart. Help me to focus on your gift and sharing it with others.